It all started with making sure I had easy foods to eat while I braided my hair. Friday night I went out and didn't braid ANY of my hair. Instead, I was at the bar and drank two vodka & cranberries. Then I also had 1/2 of a beer. I don't even drink beer. It was a long night. Driving home Saturday morning, I stopped at McDonald's and got a Steak, Egg, & Cheese bagel, hashbrown, and orange juice.
So I went to the grocery store on Saturday and spent $50. I got plenty of fruit and some microwave stuff:
- Apples, peaches, nectarines, plums, watermelon, and bananas
- Morningstar Buffalo nuggets
- Morningstar Chik'n nuggets
- Lean Cuisine Steak Panini
- Lean Cuisine mushroom pizza
Totally lost control. And now I have to go weigh-in today. I don't want to, but I HAVE to because NO MATTER WHAT, I CAN'T QUIT. After I weigh in, I'll come and post where I'm at.
Here's the thing. I think I self-sabotage or something. I mean, I was SO close to ONEderland. So close, and now look at me. But it's cool, I'm not totally discouraged. I got another book on CD from the library and I'm going to start using it tomorrow. My belly dancing class is tonight. I don't wanna go. I'm on my period and I'm crampy and I'm in a bad mood and I don't wanna go. But I'm gonna go ahead and go. Because last month I said NO MATTER WHAT, I'm going to exercise even while on my period. Normally, it puts me DOWN, but this month, I'm going to master it. It already made me totally overeat, I can't let it make me not exercise, too.
I've got to get back on track. I just felf fat and ugly this weekend. I don't know what happened. :( One day I'm all happy about my weight loss and the next day, I just feel fat. WTF? I was supposed to go to a party Sunday night. I got dressed, put on my make-up, cute shoes, everything. Instead of feeling cute, I felt fat and not attractive. So what did I do? Changed into sweats and a tshirt, and went and got Ginger Snaps and ice cream. Ate half of it that night and finished it off Monday morning.
So that's my binge. I feel shitty about the whole thing. But it is what it is, right?
Today is a whole new day. Whole new day...